SFTU = Seek first to understand!

Not to be mistaken for another -very similar- acronym. 😉

There’s no ‘one size fits all’ in crisis support, because each conversation is as unique as the moment we’re in. So listen!

Tune in to powerful info, stuff like;

✅ Tension between where someone is and where they want to be.

✅ Their state of readiness for change AKA where are they on the change cycle?

✅ The strengths and coping mechanisms they’ve shown.

✅ What supports they already have (at what level of engagement).

✅ What resources like time, money and energy they have.

Offer back the combination of what you hear, not the random name of some service.

Notice how all of these referral essays are so focused on what comes before hand. It’s because referrals are meaningful with context:

➡ Given how invalidated you felt growing up, it makes sense that it’s really tough to be honest with your therapist. A lot of people struggle with opening up, in fact that’s why anonymous services exist. It makes me wonder would you like to read about self care options?

➡ It sounds like a devastating situation, stuck between caring for yourself and leaving your partner, or caring for your kids and staying. You mentioned how helpless you’ve been feeling, unable to open up to friends or family, do you have any professional supports you trust? (and then – Okay, would you like me to find some for you?)

➡ It’s clear what a struggle it’s been, between uni and work. You mentioned how you’ve thought about seeking student support but haven’t felt ready, I’m curious to ask what would have to change before you felt like you could take that next step?

➡ Though it might not feel like much, reaching out to our hotline was a big first step today. You said you don’t have money for therapy at the moment, if I could find some free services, what support would you like?

What are the common aspects in these examples? Leave a comment below! 👇🏽👀💜