To level up, current-you must die.

If the sentence above was easy to read, you didn’t get it.

To illustrate, let me show you why I get defensive.

When I’m defensive I believe the story I’m telling.

‘I’ve always …’

‘It’s not like I meant to…’

‘I just feel like you…’

Without true processing, stories become like prisons keeping my growth limited to the time when I first told them.

Each of us is a unique constellation and different dots must be connected, but the connections need to happen in sequence.

For example I could never have opened up until Marissa helped me open up.

She could never have helped me unless I had helped her.

It goes back in sequence, and each time our relationship was stuck, it’s because two dots needed to connect between our two unique constellations.

There’s no skipping the work you’re avoiding. The best way forward that I have yet to discover is becoming trustworthy to someone else who’s becoming trustworthy.

Together, we can face anything.

Who do you trust enough to let them safely trigger you?