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Simplify Suicide Support With The Scientist / Friend Model
Validation is surprisingly easy to overlook when learning non-judgement! I kept getting told collusion can be really dangerous in anonymous support, now I get why. Anonymity means as a listener I have to navigate lack of culpability! Collusion has to be consciously resisted or else I can do harm. When I first started I often…
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In Crisis Support How Do You Validate Without Colluding?
When starting out in crisis support, it’s difficult not to relate. I would hear something heart breaking and want to say ‘Hey, me too!’ but was told this isn’t appropriate… After years of service and many hundreds of conversations, I can confirm; it is inappropriate! But for so many of us (myself included) it can…
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Provide Suicide Support Without The Collusion Guilt-Trap
Social dynamics of power. To understand collusion, think of what happens when someone has what another wants. A home, food, sex or even validation and support. If you have what someone wants, you have more power than them. No need to judge or fight this, it’s a basic truth. Suicide supporters have a unique power…
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How To Validate Without Taking Sides
When navigating the often uncomfortable journey to non-judgement, there can be a lot to balance. Between staying within the framework, balancing professionalism with authenticity and learning to gain, spend and repair trust… it’s a lot! On my journey into mental health support work and non-judgemental listening, I always found it helpful to simplify as much…
